Ah, the Slurpee/Slushee. It’s so unique to the juvenile American experience. Someway, somehow, I grew into loving much simpler adult beverages with ingredients I could actually name and pronounce. Coffee contains coffee … and sometimes Bailey’s. Diet soda? Easy: aspertame, caffeine and if drinking Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, 42 flavors of WIN. But there was a time during my junior high and high school years in South Dakota when I didn’t know what was actually in my neighborhood 7-11′s slush beverage of choice, and I couldn’t have cared less. When I finished mowing that store’s lawn once every couple weeks for $20, it tasted like victory.
This slush maker mug packs nearly a pound of “super-freezing refrigerant” into a patented 12 ounce Glaciercore that will freeze a sugar-sweetened beverage of choice into a slurpy, slushy, mushy brain-icing treat inside an insulated mug. No hurry, either: this better-drinking-through-science mug will chill your cool beverage down to 34°F for up to two hours while crystalizing the ingredients. And better news still? It easily fits inside most freezer doors.
Try a few flavors and find your best fit. Coke? Root beer? Sunkist? Nestle Quik? Cream Soda? Perhaps go bold and ice some strong coffee or espresso. Or for those moments when your inner child has come of age, grown hair in awkward places, and started having funny feelings toward the girls (or guys … maybe both?), pour in a White Russian.
Some little slices of adolescence never really leave. They just get better – and slushier – with age.
Straight things are just too … I don’t know, straight. Flat. And dare I say, untrue to life.
There’s no arguing a level surface’s practicality. Fragile nick-knacks and bric-a-brac probably shouldn’t tilt like a three-legged pinball machine, especially suspended over an unsuspecting house guest’s noggin. But where one can, I don’t believe anyone should bypass displaying books and such at an askew, rakish angle.
Each set of these decorative angled wall shelves includes three medium-density particleboard shelves in a trio of sizes, as well as all the needed mounting hardware. Their beauty is in the infinite potential for making form and function one’s own. The shelves can be left their original stark white, or come ready for a splash of paint at your leisure. The trapezoidal shelves’ uniform angle measurements make nesting the units together a bottomless sea of geometric possibilities; a designer’s puzzle where there is no one right place for any piece.
The more sets one uses, the deeper the options and the greater the potential mosaic becomes. Paint them or not, nest and fit them as you wish, but what ultimately creates the shelves’ accents will be whatever angle the items inside take.
Face it: life is no straight line. Things level off when they can, but nothing holds everything perfectly steady and level forever more. So take your storage space and make a statement that reminds the world how things ultimately really end up. The ground isn’t perfect, things slide about, but ultimately everything fits into place – even when some things remain just a little askew. [Source]
It sometimes feels like Mother Nature’s stupid prank that summer must be so hot. Though I personally maintain there’s never a bad time for it, I concede coffee’s prime season effectively ended when the Kansas City Royals threw out the season’s first pitch. But with the days of cold drinks upon us come all the ever-present challenges.
The biggest fountain drinks practically never fit car cup holders, and over-icing to keep drinks cold means less to drink, and a watered-down beverage when the excess ice eventually melts. Canned thirst-quenchers heat seemingly too fast to savor them in the sun, but koozies can be so tacky, prone to wear-and-tear, and as ill-equipped to a cup holder as a Big Gulp.
That Thermos, the masters of keeping beverages the very temperatures God and Man intended them to be, should cure these specific summertime blues doesn’t shock me at all. These stainless steel can koozies – sold in sets of two – might be the last word you need in keeping on-the-go cold stuff cold.
Patented double-walled TherMax vacuum insulation will chill a cold beer or soda can up to three hours, but the exterior stays warm enough that you won’t have to worry about freezing a single finger off. More importantly, it will go wherever you go – ballpark, car, barbeque, wherever – with a durable scratch-resistant base and dimensions designed to fit most cup holders.
Here’s to you, Mother Nature. Bring it, bitch!
This Aperture Science Mug isn’t really a coffee mug. Oh, I know exactly what the headline says. I don’t care. It needs correcting. It’s not a coffee mug. The confusion is understandable. But let me point something out that will make it all clear.
Do you see that branding, “Aperture Laboratories”? That’s the rub. This is not your standard coffee cup, friends – but the patent-pending 14 ounce Aperture Science Kahphee Portal. Wonderful thing, this little handheld, non-projectile portal. Hot beverages – OK, more often than not, the bean-derivative stimulant you monkey people call “coffee” – enter one portal and rapidly vanish within another to destination unknown.
Curiously, substances that enter this portal often exit into its opposite portal with “enhanced” characteristics; souped-up levels of sucrose and frequently increased levels of lactose. Some substances acquire an unidentifiable, undefined substance that is not quite dairy but that has also displayed curiously combustible properties.
But really, just between us … just us good friends … a mug? Really? All the science to do, and you think we wasted time just making a simple mug?
A tip from your trusted friend in science: not unlike cake, the headline is a lie.
Man Vs. Food has most likely taught an unsuspecting but grateful world one enduring lesson. Other than that dignity is the market price for a T-shirt, bumper sticker and/or Polaroid on a restaurant wall, and that Mother Nature didn’t give man multiple stomachs for a reason, it’s this: enormous food just tastes better. And may I say, duh! Those phenomenal pancakes in Uncle Buck taught me that decades before.
Each of these oreos cake pans holds a ludicrous four cups of cake batter. In perspective, most whole boxes of cake mix yield about four to six cups. Would one even double this to make a Double-Stuff Oreo cake? Must we test the moral bounds of science by daring push the “stuff” into the exponential range? Stuff-Cubed Oreo, anyone? Stuff to the 10th power?
OK, kids, let’s all mop the drool before continuing. It’s not an actual crispy Oreo cookie, but this set of two non-stick aluminum cake pans allows for creating a mouth-watering, amazing facsimile. Why, only the Nabisco logo is missing, and that’s just licensing issues for you. Still, each pan makes a sandwich cookie cake that’s 1.5 inches thick and a staggering 9.75 inches in diameter. Stick to the included recipe, and you’ll craft a couple of incredible simulated Oreos cakes ready for a layer of the frosting of your choice in between. Your replica will be letter-perfect at first glance. For that last authentic touch, grab the closest knife and etch a Nabisco (or Hydrox, for all we care) logo into the top cookie. And for those who don’t care for chocolate, vanilla cake would make an equally delicious substitution.
This set also includes a 10-year warranty. Hand wash them with soapy water, avoiding abrasives and scouring pads, and begin the decade-long reign of the species that science will surely classify Orea freakingenormous.
The Original Slushee Mug ($9.95)
