Here at GG, you know we love our geek t-shirts; in fact, maybe the only thing we love better is scoring an epic deal on those stylin’ threads. Now through May 31st, you can do just that from one of our favorite geek & pop culture t-shirt merchants!

We’ve already written about their collection of Charlie Sheen t-shirts, as well as the cheeky win of the “Hello” Lionel Richie t-shirt. But one thing I really dig about Donkey Tees’ collection is how quick they are to jump on pop culture happenings and trends. Sure, they cover nostalgic movie, music, and television references – but they also have designs based on recent trends and events, something you don’t often see with other t-shirt sites.

So what’s the dealio? If you spend $50 on tees between now and May 31st, you’ll receive a free drink koozie and a free $20 gift certificate good for a purchase in June. Score!

  Donkey Tees Memorial Weekend Sale

If you don’t immediately recognize the exquisite AURYN amulet pictured above, get out from my sight and never come back. For serious.

… Oh good, you’re still here! For those of us who grew up on the wealth of fantasy films released in the 1980s, the Neverending Story “orin” necklace (as its often misspelled) is an unmistakable symbol of all things Fantasia. Worn by Atreyu (excuse me whilst my inner 8 year old swoons), the AURYN amulet guides him on his quest to save the creatures of Fantasia from “The Nothing”, a void-like plague that consumes everything in its path.

In the book version of The Neverending Story, AURYN grants wishes and simultaneously drains memories from its keeper, Bastian. But while this incredible replica by Plumevine may not offer the same powers, it’s absolutely captivating to behold. Hand-carved and painted from resin clay, the amulet’s detail is stunning – from the lustrous, metal-like paints, to the dual-toned chatons used for the serpent eyes, to the antique look of the included brass-tone chain. Sadly, the original AURYN amulet has sold, but Plumevine offers other similarly inspired designs (though it’s likely another AURYN replica will be listed soon). This is one truly unique item that any Neverending Story fan would treasure!

  Plumevine AURYN Designs ($140 and up)

Hey guys! Big news: Geek Gems just scored a major sponsor! So while we perform our traditional dance of jubilation and gratitude (which, to the uninitiated, looks suspiciously like a really complex version of the “Running Man”), please enjoy this word from our newest benefactor:

Hi there. You know who I am, but you don’t know my name. It was hard work and sacrifice that freed me from Vault 101, but surviving day-to-day out here in the gray, God-forsaken Washington DC Wastelands? There’s no comparison. Between molerats, mutants and roving gangs, water sometimes just won’t do the job quenching my big, big thirst.

So when it’s time to get down and dirty, hot and heavy, and very possibly lethally contaminated along the way out here in the Wastes, reach for the fortified WMT (Weapon of Massive Thirst): Nuka Cola!

  Drink Nuka Cola T-Shirt ($24)

In case the rock you’ve been living under isn’t cable-ready, the lights go out on humanity tonight. So consider this the Mortal Coil’s “Going out of Business Sale”, and this Portal tee shirt is the Blue Light Special, courtesy of RIPT Apparel! If this is really it, think hard about what else you’re really going to spend that $10 on tomorrow.

No one has said yet just exactly what will be flipping the human race’s kill-switch, but if should it happen to be Mr. Wheatley, the product of the greatest minds of a generation working together with the express purpose of building the dumbest moron who ever lived, only the strongest and toughest-tested will survive. You’d better be damn sure to eat your Wheatley’s, the smartest cereal that could possibly bear the name of something that stupid. Wear this shirt with pride, test survivors – and remember this when idiocy ends the world: you can’t spell “Aperture” without “rapture.”

This balanced apocalyptic breakfast has been brought to you by Aperture Laboratories: re-arranging Rapture for over 50 years!

  Wheatley’s Portal Shirt ($10)

     

Aliens are such sly buggers. They stealthily swarm into our atmosphere, confounding us with mysterious lights in the night sky and leaving eerie crop circles in our fields by day. But to what end? I’ll admit: inspiring conspiracy theories in their notoriously suggestible human friends must be a hoot, but surely there’s a greater plan afoot?

If you believe the stories told by Masquefaire’s spaceship earrings, the message is clear: it’s not us they’re after. But our livestock, automobiles and extinct species? Beam ‘em up, Scotty!

I can’t get enough of these ever-so cheeky and whimsically freaky earrings; makes me long for the ’80s, when you could barely last a day without hearing someone using that classic catchphrase, “where’s the beef?” If I’d only had a pair of these alien earrings, I’d touch them softly, then cast a furtive glance at the asker, a finger pointed solemnly toward the sky.

The truth is out there. ;)

  Alien Abduction Earrings ($14 and up)

Magnets are just the most endlessly utilitarian application of elementary scientific knowledge this side of electricity – and just think what happens when those two come together!

From picking up big piles of scrap iron and moving them through the air and across a crowded junkyard with a crane, to comically confusing the Insane Clown Posse, and to powering these ingenious magnetic wristbands, their seemingly magic powers know no bounds. Name the small metal part or implement you could easily lose quick as a sneeze or accidentally tipping a bowl or pan over a drain, and this “+1,000,000 Bracer Of Holding” will keep it close at hand.

Nuts? Bolts? Nails? Screws? Washers? Needles? Strap the comfortable velcro strap around a wrist, and go anywhere while safely and conveniently carrying any little metal part you could need. From any position your hand could turn, they’ll stay put in a field of suspended AWESOME!

Don’t chuckle! Magnets of magic science are worth the exclamation point!

Personally, I love the idea of magnetic wristband most just because it eliminates a persistent safety concern I always have. I’ve many times stood atop a stool, chair or shelf fixing something and feared teetering backwards as Gravity laughs in my comical, wide-eyed face as I fall. A busted tailbone or broken neck only begins my worries. Half the time, my chompers are clenching nails and screws that could shred my mouth and throat on the way down my gullet. So thank you, miracle magnetic wristbands, for ensuring a nail will never choke me.

  Magwear Magnetic Wrist Band ($17)

You may remember a post we wrote a few weeks ago on unique headbands for women, wherein I “oohed” and “ahhed” over an assortment of geeky and cheeky noggin accessories. My favorite of the bunch were the adorably sweet teacup crochet headbands from Etsy artisan Priscilla of “You Cute”, and I was delighted when she offered to send one my way. That’s me up there, rocking her violet teacup. I’m such a “teas”. =^_^=

You Cute crochet headbands are such a treat; the level of detail is wonderful, with the teacup sporting a wee tag that says “T” and two sugar cookies on the saucer. But if teacups aren’t your style, Priscilla also creates a number of other whimsical food treats: from s’mores to cupcakes, slices of pie to my favorite – a stack of pancakes complete with a dollop of butter and a puddle of syrup. Nom nom!

You’ll also find a wide variety of floral crochet headbands for women, girls, and even in wee baby sizes. An especially sweet idea for the latter are her “bun covers”: crocheted scoops of ice cream that fit snugly over a little one’s hair bun. All together now: d’awwwww! <3

  You Cute Headbands ($37)

Many a Lord of the Rings fan (including our very own writer, Dr. Tomorrow) owns a “One Ring” replica, but we’re willing to bet that it’s not nearly as nom-worthy as it is “precious”. So here’s your chance to right that oversight, and to pay homage to both the Tolkien classic and a nostalgic candylicious favorite, with the One Ring (Pop) t-shirt. But you’ll have to hurry – it’s available today (May 18th) only!

  One Ring Pop T-Shirt ($10)

Betcha never thought that a bespectacled belle from galaxies far, far away could be so adorably kawaii! The geek alien necklace by Antisparkle Apparel is perfect for a Sci-Fi Sally no matter her age; I can see this hanging ’round the neck of a 10 year old just as easily as one a few years (okay, decades) her senior. The delicate pink ball chain gives the girlie alien charm a sweetly feminine touch that seems to say:

“Come closer! I promise won’t bite, or even harvest your organs for intergalactic scientific research … much.” =^_^=

  Geek Alien Necklace ($12)

     

Every fascinating item we find has its story. For example: someone somewhere once looked upon an empty beer case and thought “hat.” No one knows who he was, or what he was doing. We can at least guess what he was drinking. Perhaps his roommates gave him one final warning, after his Dance of the Lampshade Hat once more resulted not in rain, or healthier crops, or a Kansas City Chiefs touchdown as he insisted it would. The jig probably instead gave way to the much less productive Crushing Of Another Lampshade Two-Step.

Whoever he was, whatever his motivation, give this genius credit: these lids prove that sometimes brain cells do survive beer baths. These sudsy stetsons are each made from a single 18-can case of Miller Lite, Coors Light or Miller Genuine Draft. Coors and Miller have both respectively officially licensed these hats, and each high crowned, wide brimmed, weather resistant hat includes an elastic band for comfort. One size will fit almost any dome.

Count on this being a conversation-starter. What we wear always makes a statement. And so does this hat: “Member Of The Opposite Sex, I love beer far more than I’ll probably ever love you. But at least I’m upfront about it. Yeehaw!”

  Beer Box Cowboy Hats ($35)