Geek Gems
virgin certificate

Ever since sex was invented (y’know, in the 1970s), there have been a variety of little tricks up the sleeves of devious-minded souls. “Just the tip, baby – just to see how it feels” … “I’m on birth control, honestly!” … But until recently, the not-so virtuous at heart (and loins) had nothing to show for their false purity. Enter the Certified Virgin Certificate! Just a dollar and your email address scores you a certificate that “recognizes your virginity” – perfect for displaying to that frigid chick you’ve been eying in church. [/End Sarcasm] In an attempt to make the idea less loathsome, the site states that “a part of your purchase will go to AIDS cure research” – but how much, the site’s not saying. Amazingly though, they claim that 465 certificates have already been sold. I guess nearly 500 wannabe virgins can’t be wrong!

Certified Virgin Certificate [via Geekologie]

{ 2 comments }

Wearable Geeky Valentines Gifts for Girls

by Scarlett on February 4, 2010 · View Comments

Valentine’s Day is but 10 days away, and what better way to profess your <3 for your favorite nerdy chick then to put it all over her chest? … On a t-shirt, I mean. Pervert!

valentines day tees

I ♥ My Geek Tee$18.99
Geek Is Sexy Tee$18.99
Binary Love Tee$18.99
Geek Love Poem Tee$18.99

dynamic heart tee 1dynamic heart tee 2

My favorite is the 8-Bit Dynamic Life Tee, which is so freakin’ sweet it’s nearly guaranteed to delight or nauseate your friends, depending upon their bitterness meter. When you and your beloved are more than 5 meters apart, the light-up decal (which runs on 3 AAA batteries) will only glow up to 2-1/2 hearts. But get a little closer and the hearts on both t-shirts will simultaneously rise to “full health”. If you’re one half of a nerdy dynamic-duo and that doesn’t melt your heart, you have no soul!

8-Bit Dynamic Life Tee$17.99 – $24.99

geeky panties

But let’s be honest – this Valentine’s Day, it’s all about getting into her pants, amirite? If you’re feeling especially cheeky (pun absolutely intended!) get her the HTTP Panties Set, complete with Hypertext Transfer Protocol status codes that only a net-savvy nerd could love.

HTTP Panties Set$7.99

{ 1 comment }

It seems like everyone has a Facebook these days, and with so many members comes so many unique and potentially annoying Facebook personalities to choose from. Which one are you? TheOatmeal.com provides a hysterical and oh-so-accurate breakdown:

annoying facebook users
annoying facebook friends

That’s only 2 out of 9 – check out How to Suck at Facebook for more hilarity! And for an even more academic breakdown, check out CNN’s own list of The 12 Most Annoying Types of Facebookers. Yes, even CNN is on the story – TMI’ers and Chronic Inviters, I’m talkin’ to you!

{ 3 comments }

Bypass phone menus with Fonolo!

by Scarlett on February 3, 2010 · View Comments

fonolo

How much do you love calling customer service numbers? Personally, they’re the bane of my existence and I avoid them at all costs – which, thankfully, it much easier to do than ever before, now that most accounted-related inquiries can be handled online. Just the other day, my boyfriend got assistance on a 3G issue with AT&T via Twitter. Is there anything that website can’t do? (Hehe, don’t answer that question. PG-rated website, folks!)

But despite the best efforts of live chat operators and the like, you may often find the occasion of needing phone support, and up until now it was a hassle of wading through multiple menus and the interminable headache of getting your voice commands to compute. (“I said OPERATOR, not OPRAH-HATER!”) Thus, the interwebs have been all abuzz lately for a new site called Fonolo, which promises to show you how to bypass phone menus and prompts with just a few mouse clicks. So how does Fonolo work? This graphic shamelessly snagged from their site will give you the scoop:

how to use fonolo

It really is that simple, and it’s totally free as well – mega bonus! I tried it today on my auto insurance agency, which inexplicably failed to allow me to update my address through their website. (Get wit da times, yo!) Fonolo brilliantly lays out the phone tree for your selected company and leads you right to wherever you ultimately need to end up. (Obviously, the system is most useful for when you need to connect directly to a representative.) There is a caveat, however – if at any point you need to enter information, you won’t be able to advance via Fonolo only. So for example, I was able to go as far as the point where my policy number needed to be entered, and that’s where Fonolo opted to connect me to the call. And for a little extra assurance that you’re getting a productivity bonus, Fonolo gives you a call timer so you’ll know how much of your precious time is being spent on the line. I only saved about 55 seconds, but it was still well worth it to bypass the surprisingly numerous menus required to get to the end destination.

Perhaps the site’s best feature, however, is the ability to record your phone calls. This is ideal for those times when you need to report an insurance claim, dispute a credit card charge, or you’d just like a record of your conversation in case the company in question decides to pull a fast one. I’d have loved this service a few years ago, when a douchey wanker at Discover Card spent 20+ minutes refusing to close my account. Sure, you’re always told upon calling that your call may be monitored for quality assurance, but what are the odds, and is anyone really listening? Having some extra piece of mind when you need it makes Fonolo call recording a feature worth taking advantage of.

So check it out while the going’s still good and the service is still free at Fonolo.com!

{ 0 comments }

Geek Deals: Mass Effect 2 Sale

by Scarlett on February 3, 2010 · View Comments

mass effect 2

I’m well aware that I may be the only geek on planet Earth who hasn’t yet purchased my copy of Mass Effect 2, but where you see fail, I see smarts! After all, my spidey senses were tingling (in a not altogether unpleasant manner) and I had a feeling that some quality deals would pop up shortly after the ME2 release. And hark, here they come! For the next 38-ish hours, you can pick up your copy of Mass Effect 2 for PC for only $39.90 at GoGamer – and to sweeten the deal, you’ll get free shipping with coupon code SHIPFREE25. That’s about $7 cheaper than Amazon.com, which is always my go-to place for the best deals. I wouldn’t miss out on this one!

Mass Effect 2 for PC$39.90 + free shipping (code: SHIPFREE25) [via DealNews]

{ 0 comments }